This post is for my sister who always stops to comment and encourage me, regardless of whether my posts are brilliant or not.
I have this brilliant idea. I run to my computer and start typing. My fingers fly over the keys and every now and then, I smile. I can’t help it. This post is going to be so good. Eventually my fingers come to a halt and I read what’s appeared on the screen. I change a word here and there, reread my post, change some more words… until I am satisfied. Yes, my idea was brilliant. My post is brilliant. I am brilliant. Look at how skilfully I have expressed myself. The words are just right. Perfect. Wait until everyone reads this. I can’t wait to share.
I hit ‘publish’. There! Done! Have I got time to make some coffee before the comments come flooding in? I decide I can risk a few minutes away from my computer. I fill the kettle and wait impatiently while the water boils. Then I rush back to my seat.
I head straight to my Dashboard to read the comments… and there aren’t any. And I think, “Where is everyone? Why isn’t everyone at their computers waiting for my post to be published? It’s brilliant."
A vague thought enters my mind: Could there be more important things than my post? Families, work, chores, crying babies, homeschooling… No. It’s more likely everyone is away from their computers making coffee.
So five minutes pass. Surely everyone has returned by now. They’ll all have read my post. They will think it is wonderful. My Dashboard will soon be overflowing with comments. But when I look… there still aren’t any.
By the time bedtime arrives, I am sighing deeply. No one has commented on my brilliant post. It hasn’t even had many page views. Should I sit up and wait for everyone to discover it? Or should I go to bed? I decide to go to bed. I smile because I’ve had a new thought. I will be away from my computer for 8 whole hours. By the time I get up tomorrow, I will need to publish comment after comment after comment.
So I lie in bed but I can’t sleep. Words from my post keep running through my head. Finally, I drift off.
The next morning I wake instantly. I can’t wait to go online. But first, I make myself shower and have breakfast, say my prayers and do the chores. I am putting off that moment of pleasure, enjoying the anticipation. Finally I let myself turn on the computer and… I am disappointed.
A vague thought enters my head: Perhaps my post wasn’t that brilliant after all. No. It’s more likely everyone is on holiday away from their computers.
By lunch time I am fed up. I am never going to write another post. No one appreciates me. What’s the point of writing such brilliant stuff if no one reads it? I might as well talk to myself. So I resolve to give up blogging. That’s it. That’s the end of my writing career. I have no more to say.
So I close my computer. I make some coffee and think about what I’m going to do now that I’m an ex-blogger. Five minutes pass, then ten and then…
This brilliant idea pops into my head. Where did it come from? No one has ever had such a great idea before. I am sure of it. I must write it down, share it with the world. Everyone is going to be astounded. They are going to say, “Sue, we have never read such a brilliant post as this.”
So I run to my computer and start typing… The last post has been forgotten. I am chasing a new idea.
And then I remember I’m an ex-blogger. I’ve given up writing. I pause, my hands on the keyboard. After a moment, I think, “Give up writing? What a stupid idea that was!” What a stupid woman I am.
I can’t help myself. I have to write. My fingers fly over the keyboard and I smile as the words appear. This is going to be brilliant!
Then a vague thought appears in my head: What if my post isn’t brilliant? What if no one likes it? I think about this some more. I finally admit to myself that it probably won’t be as brilliant as I hope. Does that matter? You know, I don’t think it does.
The thrill is in the writing, not in the applause.
I finish my post. I hit ‘publish’ and before I know it, to my surprise, there’s a comment: “Just saw your last two posts, Sue… I've been away from my computer... Brilliant! love from your sister.”
Sisters? I smile. Mine is brilliant.
Is anyone doing NaNoWriMo next month? Is anyone going to write a novel in one month? If you are, please share!