I never used to believe in angels.  I thought they were like fairies: fanciful, imaginary creatures. I went to classes about the Faith before I became a Catholic but I don’t remember angels being mentioned. 

One day I realised Catholics believe in angels. “No!” I thought. “That’s too weird!” Could I be a non-angel-believing Catholic? I decided to put angels into the back-burner of my mind and let the idea simmer away for a time. I was sure that eventually I’d come to accept that angels really do exist. I’d already come to accept so many other ‘unbelievable beliefs’ of the Catholic Church. And that is exactly what happened. One day I woke up thinking, “Yes! Angels exist. I have a guardian angel!”

I really think angels must be patient beings. It was 30 years before I directed a single thought towards mine. My angel can’t be the only ignored angel. Sadly, there must be millions of angels in the world praying away, waiting to be acknowledged.


I don’t know the exact moment when an angel is assigned to a person. Is it at conception? Or is it at the moment of birth? I didn’t think about this until Thomas was born. There is no doubt that Thomas had a guardian angel. But did that angel pray by his side for the entire nine months of his life, or did the angel appear at the moment of his birth?

Thomas only lived for one day. During this 28 hours of life, doctors and nurses were in and out of the NICU, checking his condition. My husband Andy and I were also there as much as possible. But there were times when Thomas was alone. It was quite safe. The many monitors attached to his life support system constantly beeped and flashed, relaying every vital piece of information about Thomas’ condition to the nursing station. A doctor would have been by his side instantly if needed.

I think about Thomas being alone in the NICU, and despite the constant monitoring, I feel guilty. Our baby only lived for such a short time. Couldn’t I have foregone my own needs and stayed by his side for those hours? Did Thomas know there were times when he was all alone? I should have been there with him. I am his mother. Could I not have stayed awake and kept watch?

But I now realise that Thomas was never alone. The NICU might have appeared empty, but it wasn’t. Invisible spiritual beings were by each baby’s side. Even when Andy and I couldn’t be with Thomas in the NICU, his guardian angel was watching over him, keeping prayerful vigil, while he suffered. That angel never left his side.

Thomas died and his soul instantly left his body. His angel took it straight to God in Heaven. And so Thomas was gone from us, and so was his angel.

I never really thought about Thomas’ guardian angel while we were in the hospital. I was too wrapped up in my own pain to think clearly about the situation. It is strange how when we look back at past events, God reveals to us details we missed at the time. It's like finding another of the tiny pieces of the intricate puzzle. Instead of our memories fading, we are given more to think about and more to treasure.

Like angels, I find this gift of God truly amazing.

Image: "Fairy Girl" courtesy of Digitalart/ FreeDigitalPhotos.net

This post is linked to the Catholic Bloggers Network Link-Up Blitz


Angels is my first post for the Blogging From A to Z April Challenge. I will be attempting to blog thematically from A to Z for the entire month of April, excluding Sundays. 

Will I be able to come up with a story for each letter of the alphabet? 

Will I be able to find enough time to blog every day?

Will I write anything worth reading?

Or will everyone get fed up with me posting so often?

I hope you will join me every now and then to find out!

Post a Comment

  1. Happy Easter dear friend across the pond ;-) He is Risen! I believe angels are with us since conception - cool no? I know mine has been very active in my life so I trust that our children's are equally busy ;-)

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    1. Beate,

      He is Risen Indeed! Alleluia! Alleulia!

      It is so lovely to hear from you. I guess you have been very busy the last few months. Thank you for visiting today!

      I think I agree with you, Beate. Unborn babies need their guardian angels too.

      God bless!

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    2. Here is a link to Papa Ben speaking about them: http://www.catholicnewsagency.com/news/do-not-forget-your-guardian-angel-pope-says/

      Also the CCC: 336 From its beginning until death, human life is surrounded by their watchful care and intercession.202 "Beside each believer stands an angel as protector and shepherd leading him to life."203 Already here on earth the Christian life shares by faith in the blessed company of angels and men united in God.

      I found out several years ago that the Church does say we shouldn't name our angels... I used to be much better at having a running conversation with mine. Padre Pio was very close, as I'm sure you know.

      Yes, it's been busy here and will remain busy for a while. Somehow it seems I never can keep up! You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. Praying for a joyous Easter season for all.

      Delete
    3. Beate,

      Thank you for the link!

      I read something about angels and names in an official Church document (can't remember what document!) Yes, we shouldn't name our guardian angels. They are superior beings and we haven't the right to choose names for them like we would our pets.

      I'd forgotten about Padre Pio! Thomas and I have a special connection with Padre Pio. Perhaps I could write about that sometime.

      It is so lovely to chat. I keep you in my prayers every day. I hope you get time to relax and enjoy the Easter season.

      God bless!

      Delete
  2. I remember being skeptical about angels before I became a Catholic, but it didn't seem so strange after my conversion.

    Looking forward to seeing what you come up with for all the different letters.

    God bless:-)

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    Replies
    1. Vicky,

      I think the Holy Spirit needs time to teach us. With faith, we can believe the truth. I sometimes look back and think, "How could I ever have doubted that!"

      I hope I can come up with 26 posts! Thank you for reading.

      Delete
  3. Sue, what a great post. I love the angels and I always ask my children's guardians to watch over them when they are playing outside and I'm indoors. Can't wait to see your writing challenge for all of April.

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    Replies
    1. Anabelle,

      I am sure angels are an under-appreciated gift. What would we do without their constant care of our children? So many times a certain son of mine has narrowly escaped disaster. His angel works hard!

      Thank you for reading my post.

      God bless!

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  4. Sue, I just want you to know that I believe Thomas knew you were there (and of course his angel). He felt your love. Don't be too hard on yourself! I also think little children are more in tune to their angel; especially a child who is sick or hurt or dying.

    Gina

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Gina,

      Thank you for your reassuring words. I guess I hoped I'd have lots of time with Thomas. It was only after he died, I began to feel guilty that I'd 'wasted' those 28 hours. Actually, I hadn't slept the night before and I was so emotionally drained, I found it very hard to cope. Feeling guilty is probably just part of being a mother. We always wish we could do better as far as our children go.

      "I also think little children are more in tune to their angel; especially a child who is sick or hurt or dying." That is such a consoling thought! I must think about that some more.

      God bless!

      Delete
  5. Hello fellow Angel poster (was my topic choice too).

    Popped in from the AtoZ Challenge.

    thriftshopcommando.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tami,

      Thanks for visiting my blog. Your angel is a real treasure. I love also hunting through other people's cast-offs!

      Delete
  6. I just read "B" and loved it :) Then I realized I missed "A". I'm pretty sure we have a guardian angel from the very moment of conception so Thomas had a constant companion, though an unseen one. It's such a consoling thought to realize that we are never, ever, truly alone.

    Good luck on the A-Z challenge! (Q will tough. Though I'm sure you have Q-tips in Australia. Lol.)


    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Mary,

      I like the idea of Thomas having had a constant companion from the moment of conception. "we are never, ever, truly alone."

      I will remember your suggestion for the letter Q. Thanks! Do you have any ideas for X? X-ray seems a bit boring.

      Delete
  7. Your post for A was beautiful, I love the thought that Thomas was never alone.

    And I love that your kids buy you body butter for every occasion. Kids truly are the greatest gift in life.

    Have fun with the challenge. :)

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    Replies
    1. Jessica,

      Thank you for stopping by my blog and sharing Thomas' angel story. And my body butter one! We are ahead in time compared to most other bloggers so I've already moved onto day 2. You are so right: children are our greatest gift.

      Should be a fun month!

      Delete
  8. I agree angels are a special gift. Just saying hi, I'm with you in the challenge, great post.

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    Replies
    1. Maggie,

      Nice to meet a fellow angel appreciator! It is kind of you to stop by and say hello. Thank you!

      Delete
  9. I'm sorry for your loss, but what a beautiful story! If you ever want to read a book that will forever change your perception of Guardian Angels....please read "Send Me Your Guardian Angel". If not at Amazon....you should find it at the EWTN store. St Padre Pio sure believed in his Guardian Angel!

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    Replies
    1. Monica,

      Thank you for visiting my blog and reading my story. I appreciate that!

      And thank you for the book recommendation. I am going to hunt down a copy. We have a special connection to St Padre Pio. I am going to write a story about Thomas and this connection for my R post for this blogging challenge. Now I want to find out more about St Padre Pio and his angel.

      God bless!

      Delete

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