I have been locked away in my own writing world now for some weeks… well, I admit it… some months. There are a lot of things I haven’t been taking much notice of recently. There’s that ever increasing pile of clothes waiting to be ironed. Writing or ironing? Ironing or writing? It’s obvious. There’s no real choice. And anyway, I’m getting to quite like the look of rumpled fabric.
But there’s something else that’s been trying to get hold of my attention, something that has started to niggle at me. I’ve been pushing certain thoughts away, not wanting to face them. But this morning, well…. I looked in the mirror instead of passing by with my eyes closed. I looked properly. Turned sideways… not bad, not as bad as I’d imagined. But to make sure, I hopped on the scales.
How good I am at deceiving myself. I can tell myself anything I want to hear.  But, they say scales never lie. Shock! Horror! Am I wearing something heavy? Should I have dried my hair before hopping on? Is someone else on the scales with me? Where did those two extra kilos come from?
I pushed the scales back into the corner of the bathroom and returned to the bedroom saying, “No more cake or chocolate or biscuits! I’m putting on weight.”
Andy: “What do you mean?”
“My middle is starting to spread. I don’t want to have middle-aged spread.”
Andy grinned unsympathetically. “I hate to tell you this but you are middle-aged. Could it just be normal?”
“Normal? No!  I don’t have to look middle-aged. I don’t want to look middle-aged. It’s time to do something about it. We ought to get back into the routine of exercising and eating less junk.”
“Yes, you’re middle aged too!”
Andy went into the bathroom and a few minutes later he returned with a big smile on his face. “You won’t want to hear this. I’ve lost two kilos!”
I’ve got your two kilos!” I complained. “You’re always giving me your treats to eat.” And it’s true. Whenever Andy gets given some chocolates or other edible gift, he passes it on to me.
I walked around the room gathering up a half-eaten packet of biscuits, a bar of chocolate and some Lindt balls. I glanced into a bowl and a wine glass sitting on my desk. Too late: they were already empty. Then I hid all this good stuff away: temptation out of the way.
Then I started to think about exercise. I already do Pilates but that’s no good for weight loss. I need to get the heart working, work up a sweat, burn up some calories. Power walking? Mini trampolining? An aerobic weights routine? Running? Gulp! Get a treadmill? …  Walking, I think.
But maybe not today. It’s pouring down with rain and walking in the cold rain can’t be good for anyone. If I had a treadmill… but I don’t. Maybe the weather will be better tomorrow.
Today is a public holiday. It’s the Queen’s birthday. You can’t have a birthday without a cake. Or so the girls tell me. They are assembling a big gooey sponge cake smothered in cream and strawberries and chocolate. Will we need to stand tall, our hands on our hearts and sing the British National Anthem  -“God save our gracious Queen….”-  before we can cut the cake and dig in?
Mmmm My mouth is watering. Hang on a minute! What about the diet?
Sigh! Sigh! Perhaps I should just retreat back into my writing world. I’ll start a new story and in a few minutes I’ll have forgotten about this world and the inconvenient extra two kilos of fat. I can resume not looking in the mirror. And anyway that’s only a little bit of weight, isn’t it? Not worth worrying over.  Does it really matter?
I am thinking: what if the next time I am forced to return to reality those scales have gone up another 2 kilos and then the next time, another 2 and ….
Nothing for it.  I am going to have to become a republican. Everyone knows a republican would never celebrate the Queen’s birthday. No, I bet all those republicans out there are not enjoying this public holiday one little bit. I bet they are sitting there in protest, thoroughly miserable, just waiting to go back to work tomorrow. Well, I shall become one of them. I am going to take a stand. No celebrating the Queen’s birthday for me either. It wouldn’t be right. It would be against my principles. If this means I can’t eat that delicious creamy gooey cake… sigh! So be it.
Anyone know of a method of exercise one can engage in without leaving the computer?
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  1. Sue, Oh I wish that were the case exercise while on the computer, but I think exercise is the key...guess what I need it too. And we don't celebrate the Queens birthday either.. As Brid says the only Queen of Australia is Our Lady, Mother Mary.

  2. Sigh! Leanne, I think I'm going to need to leave my computer and start some serious moving... but I could come back in a month or so and report on my success...if the rain stops and we don't bake any more delicious gooey cakes.

  3. Too many wonderful cooks in the family! My mouth is drooling just looking at the photo of that delicious cake:)

    Nevermind, Sue, I hear that boiled cabbage tastes quite pleasant after the... um... hundredth mouthful;)

  4. "Too many wonderful cooks in the family!" How did you know I was going to write about cooking on my unschooling blog??

    You can joke, Vicky but I shall smile when I write my success story! All that cabbage will be worth it.

  5. Ha Ha! This is a great post! I wish I had a treadmill with a computer attached so I could walk and read blogs . Then I would love to work out!

  6. Last time I had a medical check up the doctor looked at my waistline and said: "You should diet!"

    "OK" I said, "what colour should I dye it?"

    He said I should do something every day that leaves me slightly out of breath. So I took up smoking.

    Eventually, I bought a treadmill. For a number of weeks now I have lost no weight at all ... I didn't realise I had to go on it! The dog enjoys it though and it saves me having to take him for a walk.

    The last time I stood on the weight scales I had put ON weight. So now I have made a life-changing resolution. I stopped using the weight scales.

    God bless.

  7. Dear Sue,
    Have your cake and eat it too.
    you can do both.... a little bit of exercise and a little bit of cake.
    if you exercise in the morning you can have a slice of cake as a reward in the afternoon.
    Life is for the living remember, just keep the boat balalnce.
    Never mind me I have all this baby fat still to get rid of...from the last 12 babies, lol
    Have a blessed week

  8. Sue
    I'm working on an exercise program that promises a flat tum in 6 weeks (they don't indicate the six of tum to start with, but I'm hoping).
    anyhow doesn't really take long to do, but does burn. I'm happy to type up and send to you if you want. I was planning on starting the 'Yummy Mummies' club for my sis and sil, you are welcome to join us if you like?

  9. Hi auntie Sue.
    I like that cake it looks really yummy.
    From Melanie xo xo

  10. Hi Sue, I hear you about sitting at the computer when I should be up and moving. I need to exercise more. I have done the Rosary Workout you gave me but I must admit, my mind wanders when I'm in motion. Heck, it wanders when I'm still too. Always need to refocus myself!

    We don't celebrate our president's birthday so I think it's not unpatriotic to skip celebrating the queens.

  11. Misty - a computer linked up to a treadmill? Sounds wonderful. I bet someone invents one some day. Actually thoughts of netbooks and exercise bikes have been running through my mind...there must be a way!

  12. Victor - " I stopped using the weight scales." You're my kind of person! Your comment is very amusing.

    Actually I do like exercising and I used to be very disciplined but writing just seems to have got a hold of me recently...

  13. Gae, you are very sensible. It's all about balance. Where would we be if we gave up all the feast day treats? We'd be missing out on so much. A little less writing, a little more exercising and a slice of cake every now and then. Sounds good!

  14. Erin, a Yummy Mummies club? It sounds intriguing. Tell me more and please share all you have. I could do with some help. Thank you!

  15. The cake was delicious, Melanie! Yes, I had just a little sliver of a slice. I said, "No cake for me, please" and everyone protested: "We made it specially Mum. You can't not have any." Everyone moaned so much I said "Ok I'll just have a little bit." Then everyone laughed, "We knew you couldn't resist!" I can't win. I will have to ban everyone from baking any more delicious cakes.

    I wonder if you like to bake cakes, Melanie.

  16. Noreen,

    My mind wanders while exercising and saying the Rosary too! So I tried listening to an online Rosary instead of trying to say the prayers by myself. My mind still wanders but I at least get a few prayers said and hear the meditations.

    I had this idea this morning: I could drag the unused exercise bike into my bedroom, and click onto an online Rosary. I'll let you know how I get on!

    I remember you have a dog. That must take you away from the computer and get you moving!

  17. Sigh. I've put on weight, too. My husband eats like a horse and never gains an ounce while I eat like a bird and STILL gain weight. No fair :) I know that I need to exercise more but I get caught up on the computer instead so I guess it's my fault.
    Victor's remark cracked me up!
    I enjoy going for walks and praying the Rosary - my mind wanders a bit but I still like it. I just need to do it more often!

  18. The computer is so addictive. It's difficult to close it down and do some exercise. Yes, praying the Rosary and walking is a great idea, Mary. I've just got to be more disciplined!

    I really enjoyed writing this story but when it came time to publish it, I thought, "Do I really want everyone to know I've put on weight?" But it's been great how everyone has shared. And yes, Victor's story was very amusing. I think he should hire himself out as a professional commenter!

  19. Yep Sue, my doggie gets me moving or he won't let us sleep at night. He's 95 pounds and strong as an ox... a very healthy big dog! We went out this evening with a friend and her dog, it was beautiful out. So pleasant and the dogs came back tired. Always good when they do that!

  20. Hi auntie Sue.
    I have never baked a cake. So I am going to get my mum to help me today.
    I also have a new post on my blog.
    From Melanie xo xo

  21. You are hilarious! I so enjoyed this post!!

  22. Thanks Dana! Humour is strange. Sometimes when I mean to be funny, everyone thinks I'm being serious. Perhaps you have a similar sense of humour to me and can appreciate my silliness!! I am sitting here smiling and feeling happy because of your comment. God bless!

  23. Oh my goodness! I only wish we were friends way back so that I did not miss this when it was "new..." I have a lot of SEW posts to catch up on...this is hilarious...I just love your style! Love it.

    Andy sounds like a gem. Speaking of which I love your daughter's name. (Gemma Rose) The bday cake story was so cute as well.
    Thanks for sharing!
    Hey why not link up the Q's bday post to Mem Mon or this one?

    Oh good grief, I just had a thought...please please .....we cannot let Obama know about this Queen's bday thing. He'll be instituting a holiday over here on HIS bday next. He already thinks he's king. He's a little confused about the whole elected official-serving the people thing vs monarchy.
    Ok, I digress....sigh.
    But BTW I love the pageantry of the royals.
    Have a lovely day Sue!

    Love ya

    1. Chris,

      I am so pleased you shared an old story. When I reread it, I remember exactly how I felt the day I wrote it. Andy and I were getting dressed and discussing weight and then I just had to sit down and write this story which flew into my mind. Don't you just love it when stories appear like that?

      Andy is a gem. He never minds me writing about him, and is always so supportive whatever I get myself mixed up in.

      Obama's birthday... Oh no! I'll keep very quiet. We wouldn't want him getting any big ideas.

      I'll be right over to link a story to your Monday memoir link up. Thank you for the invitation!

    2. BTW that cake looks outrageous! I think you should link to some of those recipe/crafty hops that are popular! Call it the Queen's Bday Cake... it's delish looking.
      ALSO, I purchased the sewing book in today's post ( 6/10/13) Timmy will love that he is an avid sewer! I should gather his creations and let him write an art post about them! Anyway, the sewing monsters book looks right up his alley.I'm sure he will enjoy. Thanks for that
      Ok, now I really do have to turn in.
      Take care!
      Love ya

    3. Chris,

      The Queen's Birthday cake? That sounds so grand!

      You bought the sewing book! I am so interested to hear your son is a sewer. Yes, get him to write a post and add photos of his creations. I'd love to see them!

      I hope you actually sleeping while I'm writing this. It should be bedtime where you are!


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